Thor - no Alexander Skarsgard, but at least we had organic Chocolate

Okay, so, armed with Nativa Organics Milk Chocolate, we headed off to the theater to watch Thor, a movie starring Stellan Skarsgard (Professor Erik Selvig), Natalie Portman (Jane Foster), Colm Feore (King Laufey), Tom Hiddleston (Loki), Renee Russo (Frigga), and Anthony Hopkins (Odin).

Oh yeah, and the guy who played Thor--no, sorry, it wasn't Alexander Skarsgard--Chris Hemsworth (yeah, yeah, I've already said this guy played Thor, get over it already).

First, it's important to mention that it's against the law to bring outside food into movie theaters.  You can be charged for this heinous crime and maybe thrown in jail or something.  I really don't know what the consequences are; I've never been caught!

Anyway... the reason I smuggled chocolate into the movies centers around two important facts:  1)  it just tastes so much better than the standard fare  and 2)  cane sugar far outranks the processed sugars in movie candy.

On top of the chocolate, I ended up drinking bottled water with popcorn.  I'm not into the fountain pop.  I'd rather just lick a few sugar cubes.  I'm considering smuggling in Jones Soda next time.  We'll see how that goes...  Of course, the popcorn tasted good.  It could sit in the cupboard for 3 days and turn soft and it would still appeal to me.  That's how I roll, I guess.

Back to Thor... It is ironic that Stellan Skarsgard has a part in the movie, but his son, Alexander doesn't.  From what the internet says, he did make the running, just not the final cut.  I'm willing to bet that the choice came down to pure looks.  Dare I say that Hemsworth is a tad cuter than the wonderful Eric Northman?  I just did.

As far as acting goes, AS far outranks the chosen Thor.  I mean, seriously, the chemistry between Thor and Jane is best summed up as lukewarm water, with Jane doing all the heating.

Hey, it had to be said.  Sure, the guy comes across as pure Eye Candy, but there are only a couple scenes that appreciate that aspect.  Let's see, they gave us the topless tight jeans, the walking around in jeans and t-shirt, and the must-struggle-with-Hammer sweaty bit.  Okay, maybe there were a few more shots, but still...


Judging from the audience on the night that we went, it presented as enjoyable and fun.  And yes, the people behind the production clearly knew that they chose Thor for visual affect; even the Manly Males in the seats were making noise when the camera shots purposely honed in on his handsome attributes.

Speaking of Manly Things, I had trouble with the believability concerning his Hammer.  It just came across as fake.  I don't know if the colouring had anything to do with it, or maybe the long, skinny   handle did, but it just didn't work for me at all.  Even if the handle was made out of pure steel, it just didn't fly.

All the celestial CGI artwork, on the other hand, did turn out as beautiful scenery.  Maybe it's because I'm not an astrophysicist or astronomer; it looked fine to me.  Even the ice scenes with King Laufey turned out quite pleasing to the eye.

Tom Hiddleston's Loki didn't come across as too sinister.  I suppose that's a good thing, since some parents brought their toddlers into the theater to watch the movie. Yeah, crazy, I know, especially given that the scenes with Laufey were a bit too dark for that age group.  Maybe the parents thought the PG-13 rating didn't apply to their uber-intelligent 3 and 4 year-olds.

I can't say much about Russo's bit part, other than she looked nice.  She played a wonderful mommy to Thor and Loki, yes she did.  I don't remember any of her lines though, maybe something about love...

Portman did alright as a gung-ho scientist working her way towards producing big results in the science world.  I wonder how she would have played opposite AS.  But she  did a fine job given the Thor at her disposal.

All in all the movie came across as light and fun, but I definitely wouldn't bring a toddler or preschooler to see it.  I would, however, bring all my single firends who are into hot Viking men.

Ratings

Thor:  7 / 10 - Loses 1 point for the fake looking Hammer and 2 points for the miscasting of Thor.   Otherwise, it's an enjoyable experience with many fun moments.

Nativa Milk Chocolate:  9 / 10 - Great tasting organic chocolate.  Only one problem, it's so yummy that I wolf it down faster than Loki travels between worlds and schemes his way through deals with King Laufey.